Chronicles (Part I): Setting Sail

As I mentioned in the introduction to this site, my departure from England occured some time ago. I'm collecting and sharing these posts now because I have moved past the place of pure frustration and confusion to a place of increased perspective. Again, my journey is not yet complete. But perhaps I've seen a sufficient amount along the way that I can now more safely navigate the waters. That said, I don't want to ignore the fact that I've crossed paths with my fair share of dangerous lands- most, if not all, of which were intentionally approached (you can decide for yourself the wisdom of these decisions).

So before I share with you the experience of the seasoned yachtsman, I feel compelled to share the (in)experience of the foolish runaway. Just like Chesterton felt in recounting his voyage, many of these "chronicles" are somewhat embarassing to me now- just as, I'm sure, my current ones will be at a later time. But the point of this endeavor is not to preserve my pride. It is to be honest...

I'll be posting seven pieces from the early parts of my journey.

05/26/2006

It seems to me as though faith and intelligence are at an impasse. An intelligent outlook on life would tell you to discern all that you see, to ask why before drawing conclusions, and to question that which you hold to be true. Yet, the Bible clearly states that to be a Christian is a matter of faith. Growing up in church, I was led to believe that faith in Christ will save me from my sins, and that without faith I would be lost. So, I wonder, is it therefore impossible for a Christian to have an intelligent outlook on life? Would not the term intelligent Christian be a complete oxymoron? We are told that to be a good Christian is to have “faith like a child”. Well, children can be deceived easier than your everyday house pet. So am I not, by holding to this blind faith, rejecting the intelligence that I have been given as a human being?

If this whole Christianity thing is really worth giving up my life, as Jesus taught, then it must be much more than simply a religion. It must be not about doctrine or denomination but about truth- absolute, all-encompassing truth. The goal must be not to develop a Christian worldview, but rather a true worldview- one that sees the world for what it really is. And if in any way those two conflict, then Christianity is therefore not real. However, if I can look through Christianity’s eyes and through truth’s eyes and see the same picture, then I am seeking after something that is well worth every part of me. The question now remains: How do I know that Christianity is truth if I am supposed to believe it simply out of faith?

Hebrews 11:1 tells us that “faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see”. I would argue that many people in the church have a wrong definition of faith. I have heard far too many times, when questioning something in the Bible, that I must simply have faith and ask God when I get to Heaven. I believe that the writer of Hebrews meant something far different than this version of faith. Sure, my questions and doubts in the Bible do not constitute rejecting my belief in God completely. But, when faith is used as a cop-out for something difficult to understand in the Bible, I believe it is taken way out of context.

You have to go back to the issue of truth. Truth not founded in fact is not a truth at all and therefore how can I truly believe it? Well, I believe my beliefs to be true- which sounds redundant, but it is essential to having real faith as described in Hebrews. If I believe something, it must not simply be because it sounds good or because a lot of respectable people believe it too. There must be more. I must believe it because it is true- because I have seen evidence of it in my life and in the lives of others. I must be able to analyze it, question it, even doubt it. And if in the end of all that it stands strong, I will believe it. Yet, this approach is rarely taken in the church, and in fact it is often shunned. We see people wrestling with their faith, questioning an apparent contradiction in the Bible, or (Heaven forbid) even studying another religion! We see them and feel sorry for them and tell them that it will be okay, that they are simply confused. Well God is a very confusing being. He is infinite, omnipotent, omnipresent. I don’t even fully understand what those words mean- of course I’m confused! Perhaps it is not the confused who are in the wrong, but rather the “understanding”.

Have you ever tried to explain algebra to your cat? Algebra’s not too difficult of a subject. It’s logical, it makes sense. Yet, the cat is absolutely incapable of understanding the words you are speaking, let alone the concepts they convey. I believe that to God we seem a lot like a cat (or any other small-brained animal). So, for me to go around feeling confident that I understand the complexities of God would be a tragic mistake. I do not and will not (in this lifetime) understand God. He is simply too big and too great for my small mind to grasp. Yet, I believe that in seeking Him and trying to understand Him, He is glorified.

I must now go back to the issue of faith. From the Bible, I already know that we must be sure of what we hope for and certain of what we cannot see. But, it is not enough to be content with not seeing. God did not fill His Word with complicated ideas and things that we cannot possibly understand without a reason. “Seek and you shall find”. God wants us to seek Him. God wants us to question… because when we question truth we can only come out believing in it more than when we started. Every time we question something in the Bible and find the answer, we glorify God by strengthening our belief in Him. And when we cannot find the answer, we rely on faith that God is sovereign and that it is in His control. But we cannot stop seeking, we cannot stop digging deeper into the well of knowledge that is God.